pizza:

your favourite celebrity could be pooping right now

(via deadlyspoons)

dampsandwich:

the entire school was burning down and i had to pull the fire alarm. i sprinted over to it. there was writing on it in permanent ink. it said: if you pull this down you are gay. no way was i pulling the fire alarm anymore

(via mnoica)

bandbutts:

If masturbating while stoned isn’t called weed whacking I don’t know how to live my life anymore

(via mnoica)

rneerkat:

watching fish movies makes me cry i get so nemotional

(via clubpenguln)

antisociallysplendid:

memyselfandhate:

iamonlydorb:

sucysucyfivedolla:

the inside of your butt is warm enough to hardboil an egg

oh no I’m not falling for this one again

what

again?

(via its-barack-o-llama)

irresponsibleeyouth:

The trick is to not let people know how really weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

(via its-barack-o-llama)